Zombie face

How To Survive a Zombie Apocalypse

by

A guest post by Ashley Connolly

I truly believe that the importance of preparation for the inevitable Zombie Apocalypse in the near future needs to be taken in consideration by everyone.

Due to the consumption of foods containing GMO’s, pesticides, gluten, sugar, hormones in dairy, trans fats, preservatives and other food nasty’s; The end of days is certainly upon for sure.

To avoid the unimaginable pain and despair I’ve compiled this list of helpful exercises to aid your Zombie Apocalypse preparation, and reduce the probability of being munched on by the un-dead.

So, without further ado (an American term for get the f*ck on with it), here goes with my top 5 exercises for survival: –

1. Farmers Walks

Train yourself to carry heavy weaponry and food supplies, mainly organic coconut oil.

2. Yolk Walks

Briskly carry the mortally wounded on your back to safety. So they can be killed in private before they turn.

3. Box Jumps

Practice the ability to fling yourself over high obstacles when being chased.

4. Muscle Ups

High walls and scaffolding are a piece of gluten free cake when you master the muscle up to make a quick and effortless escape.

5.  Hill Sprints

I pity the fool who cannot run up a hill. If you can’t run fast, you’re already dead.

So there you have it guys.

Add these exercises into your training regime, before it’s too late!

Ashley

 

*Ashley Connolly is an advanced personal trainer and senior coach at Joshua Paul Fitness based in Manchester, U.K, and is a student on the Ric Moylan Mentoring Programme.

Follow Ashley here on Facebook.

One Response to "How To Survive a Zombie Apocalypse"
  1. Brilliant read. Great job Ash, all I need to do now is learn how to do a muscle up for my quick and efficient escape????????

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